Here are a few diarrhea-related stories set in the all-too-relatable and public space of a grocery store. Each story builds off that familiar feeling of urgency, with some unfortunate (and funny) outcomes:
1. The Aisle of Doom
Emily was having a normal Saturday. She had just finished lunch at her favorite taco spot and decided to stop by the grocery store to pick up a few things. Everything was going well until she reached the dairy aisle.
Suddenly, her stomach gurgled ominously. Emily froze, gripping her cart for support. “Not now, not here,” she whispered to herself. But her stomach had other plans.
She tried to make a beeline for the restroom at the back of the store, but with each step, the urgency intensified. Just as she was halfway down the cereal aisle, the inevitable happened: a cramp hit so bad it made her knees buckle.
Panicked, she abandoned her cart and power-walked toward the bathroom. But halfway there, she felt a sudden, warm explosion—diarrhea struck. The horror set in as she realized there was no coming back from this.
She didn’t even grab her groceries. She just left. Somewhere in aisle seven, a cart still stands abandoned, filled with groceries and the memory of Emily’s disaster.
2. The Checkout Catastrophe
James had just finished loading up his groceries on the checkout belt when he felt a strange gurgle in his stomach. At first, he thought it was nothing—probably just hunger pangs from skipping breakfast.
But as the cashier scanned his items, the feeling intensified. James shifted uncomfortably, trying to discreetly clench his cheeks. Sweat began to bead on his forehead.
As the last item was scanned, James reached for his wallet. That’s when it hit. The urge was so strong, it felt like his stomach was waging war against him.
His hands trembled as he fumbled to pay. He prayed silently, willing the cashier to move faster. But as he reached for his change, disaster struck. James felt the unmistakable sensation of his bowels letting go.
He panicked. Should he run? Should he stay and hope no one noticed? Before he could decide, the cashier handed him his receipt with a concerned look.
James grabbed his bags and bolted out of the store, praying no one would remember his face. The groceries were a loss, but his dignity took an even bigger hit.
3. The Produce Section Panic
Maya was happily perusing the produce section, examining a bag of avocados for ripeness, when her stomach made a sound akin to a dying animal. Her eyes widened in panic.
It came out of nowhere. One minute, she was debating between organic and non-organic, and the next, she was desperately squeezing her cheeks together, praying she wouldn’t have an accident in the middle of the grocery store.
The restroom was on the other side of the store, through the meat section, past the frozen foods, and just next to the pharmacy. But Maya wasn’t sure she could make it.
She abandoned the avocados and speed-walked toward the bathroom, hoping she didn’t look as frantic as she felt. But just as she turned the corner into the cereal aisle, it hit.
The pressure was too much. Maya barely made it three steps before she felt the warm liquid explode. It was over. Defeated, she stood there for a second, trying to figure out what to do next.
That’s when a store employee approached her and asked, “Ma’am, are you okay?”
Maya, face red as a beet, whispered, “I’m not.”
4. The Sample Station Disaster
It was Saturday afternoon, and the store was bustling with shoppers. Anna had just finished picking out her groceries when she noticed the free sample station offering mini tacos. She couldn’t resist—who says no to free food?
She popped a taco in her mouth and continued shopping, but about five minutes later, her stomach gave a deep, unsettling rumble. She ignored it at first, thinking it was just her body reacting to the food. But within minutes, the pain hit like a freight train.
Sweating and panicking, Anna abandoned her cart and sprinted toward the restroom. But it was too late. As she passed the canned goods aisle, diarrhea struck. Anna stopped dead in her tracks, horrified at what had just happened.
With no other option, she grabbed a nearby pack of paper towels and tried to hide the damage as best as she could. When a passing employee asked if she needed help, Anna replied, “No, just looking at soup.”
She never returned to that store again.
5. The Produce Sprinkler Misunderstanding
Jacob had been walking around the grocery store for about 15 minutes, carefully picking out vegetables for the week. He felt a small rumble in his stomach, but he figured it was nothing major. After all, he just needed to grab a few more things and head home.
But as he bent down to pick up a bag of spinach, his stomach suddenly flipped. In a panic, he stood up too quickly, knocking over a pyramid of tomatoes. Everyone turned to look, but Jacob wasn’t focused on the tomatoes—he was focused on not exploding.
He tried to play it cool, picking up the fallen tomatoes, but his body had other plans. Suddenly, without warning, the produce sprinklers kicked on, misting the vegetables—and Jacob’s explosive diarrhea started at the same time.
In the confusion, another customer shouted, “Hey, you’re leaking!”
Jacob, mortified, looked down and realized it wasn’t the produce that was soaked—it was him. He grabbed his bags, muttered an apology, and bolted for the exit before anyone could stop him.
6. The Long Bathroom Line Horror
Katie was having a great day—until she got to the grocery store. She was halfway through her shopping when she felt a familiar gurgle. No big deal, she thought, just a quick trip to the bathroom and everything would be fine.
But when she got to the restroom, her worst fear was realized: a line. A long one. Four people stood in front of her, and from the looks of it, none of them were in a hurry.
Katie clenched as tightly as she could, praying the line would move faster. But it didn’t. Every time the door opened, another person walked in, and Katie’s panic intensified.
By the time it was her turn, she was sweating bullets. She rushed inside, but as soon as she sat down, it was too late—the diarrhea had already started.
She cleaned up as best as she could, but when she walked out, the line had grown, and she could feel their eyes on her. “That’s the girl who couldn’t hold it,” they must have been thinking.
Katie left the store without finishing her shopping. There are some things you just can’t recover from.
7. The Couponing Catastrophe
Michelle was an avid couponer, always looking for the best deals. She had her cart full of items and was proud of the discounts she had scored. But her stomach began to cramp as she stood in line waiting for the cashier to ring everything up.
She told herself it would be fine. Just a few more minutes, and she could hit the restroom. But the cashier was painfully slow, and the cramps were getting worse.
By the time the cashier got to the final item, Michelle was desperate. She shifted nervously, hoping no one could tell what was happening. But just as the cashier finished, Michelle felt her stomach give up.
It was quick and violent—diarrhea right there in the checkout line. Michelle’s face turned pale as she grabbed her groceries, mumbling, “I have to go,” before sprinting out of the store.
She left behind a stack of coupons and a very confused cashier.
8. The Speed Shopping Disaster
Rob was running late for a BBQ but needed to pick up some last-minute groceries. He dashed into the store, grabbed everything he needed, and headed to the checkout.
As he waited in line, he felt a deep rumble in his gut. Diarrhea was coming, and it wasn’t going to wait. He looked around frantically for a restroom, but the closest one was at the back of the store.
He couldn’t wait. Rob abandoned his groceries and sprinted toward the bathroom. But as he reached the frozen food aisle, he felt it—diarrhea exploding before he could even make it halfway.
Rob slowed to a walk, defeated, as he left the store, wondering how he’d explain this one to his friends at the BBQ.
