You think modern taxes are absurd? Try living in medieval England, where passing gas could literally cost you.
Welcome to the wild world of historical flatulence regulation — where kings, monks, and tax collectors all had opinions about your intestinal emissions.
The Great Fart Levy of 1307 (Probably)
While historians debate the exact details, medieval records suggest that some English manors imposed what we’d now call a “fart tax” on tenants. The technical term? Pedage — literally “foot tax,” but colloquially known as the “windy tribute.”
The logic was simple (and completely bonkers): If you lived on the lord’s land, everything you produced belonged to him — including your gas. Tenants who worked in close quarters, particularly weavers and blacksmiths in shared workshops, were allegedly required to pay an annual “air quality” fee.
One shilling per year for the right to fart freely. That’s about $30 in today’s money. For perspective, that’s roughly what a Netflix subscription costs — except instead of streaming rights, you’re buying farting rights.
The Monastery Problem
Medieval monks had their own flatulence crisis. Monasteries operated on strict silence rules, which created a philosophical dilemma: Is a fart a sound?
According to the Rule of St. Benedict (written around 530 AD), monks were forbidden from making unnecessary noise. But the human digestive system doesn’t care about your vows. The solution? A complex system of “acceptable circumstances” for breaking wind:
- During prayers: Forbidden (obviously)
- During meals: Acceptable if silent (the original SBD protocol)
- During manual labor: Fully permitted (work farts don’t count)
- In the infirmary: Encouraged (seen as releasing evil humors)
Some monasteries went further, establishing designated “wind chambers” where monks could retreat for relief without disturbing their brothers. These were essentially medieval fart booths — the phone booths of flatulence.
Royal Flatulence Exemptions
Of course, if you were rich or powerful enough, you could fart tax-free. Royal charters occasionally included specific exemptions for “natural bodily functions” — basically, nobles got unlimited gas rights.
King Edward I (1272-1307) was allegedly known for his thunderous emissions during court proceedings. His solution? He declared that anyone who complained about royal flatulence could be charged with treason. Problem solved.
The penalty for questioning the king’s gas? A fine of ten shillings — ironically, ten times the annual fart tax for commoners. The message was clear: The king’s farts are priceless. Yours cost money.
The Black Death Gas Theory
When the bubonic plague ravaged Europe in the 14th century, medieval physicians developed some… creative theories about transmission. One popular belief? Miasma — the idea that disease spread through bad air.
This led to an ironic reversal: Suddenly, farting was encouraged as a way to expel plague vapors from the body. Some towns actually suspended fart taxes during plague years, declaring it a public health measure.
Physicians prescribed beans, cabbage, and onions to maximize gas production. The theory? If you’re farting, you’re purging evil humors and preventing infection. Spoiler alert: It didn’t work. But medieval streets must have smelled incredible.
The French Connection
France had its own approach to flatulence regulation. Rather than taxing it directly, French nobles employed professional “fart catchers” — servants whose literal job was to stand behind their masters during banquets and absorb the blame for any audible emissions.
These unfortunate souls were called soupeurs d’aise (“comfort sippers”) and were paid handsomely for their service. Their primary skill? Maintaining a straight face while taking credit for someone else’s gas.
The position was surprisingly competitive. Experienced fart catchers could earn more than skilled craftsmen, proving once again that people will pay premium rates for plausible deniability.
The Great Fart Riot of 1381
The English Peasants’ Revolt of 1381 had many causes — taxation, serfdom, inequality. But according to some contemporary accounts, one trigger was the expansion of the fart tax to include livestock.
When tax collectors began assessing fees based on the “methane output” of cattle and pigs, farmers revolted. The logic: If they had to pay for their own flatulence and their animals’ emissions, they’d be broke.
While the revolt was ultimately about broader issues, the livestock fart tax became a rallying cry. One rebel banner allegedly read: “We will not pay for air that comes from below.” Poetry in motion.
Modern Echoes
Before you laugh too hard at medieval gas taxation, consider this: Several countries today impose “methane taxes” on livestock farming. New Zealand nearly passed a “fart tax” on cattle in 2003 (farmers protested, it was dropped). Denmark implemented one in 2024.
So while we’ve ditched the per-person fart fees, the basic concept of taxing emissions — whether from people, cows, or cars — remains alive and well. We’ve just rebranded it as “carbon pricing” and “environmental policy.”
King Edward I would be proud. Or at least extremely confused.
The Bottom Line
Medieval fart taxes were probably more legend than law, but they reflect a universal truth: Governments will tax anything they can quantify — even if that thing is invisible, odorous, and erupts from your backside.
The good news? You can fart freely today without worrying about the tax man. The bad news? If you’re a cow in Denmark, you’re out of luck.
Want to see how your personal emissions stack up against medieval standards? Try our Fart Calculator — no taxation involved, we promise.
Got any legendary fart stories from history? Drop them in the comments. Let’s keep this wind-powered time machine going.
